Glucose INtolerance!

I am alive, a little less blood circulating through my body, but alive. I sincerely hope that I never have to do that again! I had all good intentions of getting up at 6:00 this morning to have some quiet time, but I stayed up way too late last night, instant messaging with someone, who shall remain nameless, but her initials are J.E.S.S.! We were just having so much fun, I nearly bust a gut laughing and I am not exaggerating! Thanks, Jess.

So I woke up at 7:15 to Joe yelling, "Mommy!" He has this adorable way of saying "Mommy" that I can only liken to a caveman calling for his woman. Perhaps yelling is not a descriptive enough word, it is more of a bellow, yes, that's it! A bellow, he is really funny. John and Jeremy were already downstairs, sitting on the big chair, watching Cyberchase. I stumbled came down the stairs to a sweet chorus of, "Good morning, mommy." They informed me that they had already made their beds, gotten dressed and brushed their teeth (and cleaned the sink I might add.) I love it when that happens!

I walked into the kitchen and reached for the coffee...Doh! I can't have coffee, I am fasting, ugh! No coffee, no food, no happy! Laurie called me at 7:30 and she sounded worse than I did, she said she would be over in 15 minutes. She offered to watch the boys for me while I went for my bloodwork, thanks, my sistah!

She arrived and I headed over to Lab Corp for my six-hour, did you say 6 hours?, yes, my six-hour glucose tolerance test. I thought, alright, I can do this, six blood draws, I'll be O.K. I got there and a lovely little red-head informed me that she would have to draw blood 8 times. That is not a typo, it's an 8. Two less than ten and seven more than one, oh, man, what a day to not be able to have coffee. She did, however, give me a lovely little beverage called, Orange Syrup That Will Coat Your Teeth In Fuzz And Cause Your Stomach To Make Alien Noises, either that or Glucose Beverage, I can't remember. Like I said, it was early and there was no caffeine circulating in my blood to keep me alert and observant.

Surprisingly, the hours passed by quickly. I brought East of Eden with me and had planned on reading the whole time. After about 3 hours, I began to feel the effects of not having eaten and my head was starting to pound and my stomach was growling, very loudly. I went out to the truck, set the alarm in my cell phone, lay down on the back seat and passed out. I slept the sleep of the dead, but I felt worse when I woke up then before I went to sleep. I went back into the lab for, yet another blood draw. Five down, three to go.

At 2:30, they drew the last of my blood and I went home, where there was coffee and peanut butter and jelly. Kevin came home and I hit the couch, I really can't believe how wiped out I feel. He looked at my arms and said:

K: Oh, honey.

L: I know, I look like a crack addict.

K: (laughs and shakes his head) You don't inject crack.

L: Isn't that a speedball?

K: (wonders how I have lived this long in society) Stick to blogging, sweetie.

I am going to bed and in the morning, I will have coffee!