...and I forgot to get the milk!

So. Here I sit, extremely uncomfortable because of this. I linked it because I don't really want to shout it out for the whole world to know. This way, I figure, we'll just keep in 'tween us girls!

It started yesterday morning, but I didn't know what it was. I dropped John off at school and headed for the gym. There I did what all women do, I asked the girl on the treadmill next to mine if she ever had the thing which we are not saying out loud. It's alright, I have known this girl for three years and she is well versed in the thing which we are not saying out loud because she has had it before. She asked me if I was on antibiotics and (hello!!) I am! Well there you go she said, you have the thing which we are not saying out loud.

I go home and decide that if I shower, maybe it will go away. Not so much with the disappearing act for the thing which we are not saying out loud. I went all day and when Kevin got home, I ran to the drugstore, I also told him I would get more milk.

Let me just say here that there are entirely too many products on the market for this type of thing. Just give me the cure, people, the cure, without all of the fancy marketing!

I head to the cash register with the goods and there is a line full.of.men. Dear heavens, why? Do you really need paper towels and a green highlighter that badly??

So, I get on the line, carefully trying to conceal my feminine product, and there are three men in front of me. One of the men needs assistance because an item that was on sale was not marked on sale. The line is getting longer. More men! Are they bussing them in?

My turn. I sometimes have this weird sixth sense about things and I just knew that what I am about to tell you, was going to happen.

The cashier takes my item and begins trying in vain to scan it for a price. I can see that she is getting anxious because the line of men is still growing. We begin a dialogue.

Cashier: Was this in the right place on the shelf?
Me: Uhh, I think so.
Cashier: Well was there a price on it?
Me: Umm, yes, I did see prices on the shelves.
Cashier: How much is it?
Me: I don't know. There are so many of these products back there that it's impossible to tell the difference between them.

The cashier picks up the phone and I hear the music coming from the speakers cut out and I want.to.run.away. because I know what's coming.

Me: I can go check, I'll get out of line and go.
Cashier: No, Steven can check for us.

In my mind I am hoping that Steven is pinned under something very, very heavy.

Cashier: Oh, look here he comes now.

In my mind again, Darn, he's not crushed!

Cashier: Steven, would you go get a price for this, please.

Steven begins to walk away and as he turns the corner and disappears into the candy aisle he asks, in the loudest voice known to man, What was that stuff called again?

Cashier: MONISTAT, IT'S FOR YEAST INFECTIONS.

Psst, cashier, those are the words that we are not saying out loud.

Sigh.

...and I forgot to get the milk.

Look to the finish!