I know, I know. Blog something already!

I actually have some big news to report, I am quitting my job. There are a plethora of reasons surrounding this decision but the most important reason is my children. Three mornings a week I drag them from their cozy little spots on the couch and out to a gym so that I can earn too little money, be completely aggravated and continue to destroy my left heel.

On Monday I began to have this nagging feeling of, "This is not right." I went to teach my class and thought maybe if some blood got pumping to my brain I would feel differently. Nope. Didn't happen. I felt worse.

We are used to very laid back, relaxed mornings and with me working, they have been less than relaxing. The restless is really in my own heart because I know this is not how I want things to be. The one thing that has been suffering is our bible and prayer time, the key ingredient to a peaceful day. We do this over breakfast and because our breakfast routine has had a major upheaval, so has our bible time. I try to fit it in at other times during the day but that hasn't been working either. It dawned on me that I am teaching my children things that I don't want them to learn.

I am teaching them that there are things more important than spending time with God. I am teaching them that what I want supersedes what's right for them. I am teaching them that their education is not my first priority. I don't want them to learn these things so I am saying, "When." I have had enough.

All day Monday I had a nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach that would come and go. Everytime that I felt it, I just prayed for wisdom. I knew, though, that I should quit working, that was the only option that afforded me any kind of peace.

I knew that I had to call Kevin and tell him what I was thinking. I have always felt a little bit guilty when I don't work. It's not that we need the extra money to live, but when I am earning a paycheck then I don't feel so bad about buying shoes or doing extra activities with the boys such as art and drum lessons.

I called him and told him that I wanted to quit my job, that I thought it was what I should be doing. His replied with the guilt allaying, "Good. It's too much right now."

I feel so free! Teaching aerobics is not a noble venture like curing cancer or being a shoe maker, but it was fun. I always said that when it stopped being fun, I wouldn't do it anymore. It's not fun. I'm not doing it anymore. I agreed to finish out this week but not without some gliches. My plantar fasciitis, the one that I thought was gone? She's back, and with a vengeance. Last Wednesday's step class was so excruciatingly painful for me to teach that I wanted to cry. Seriously. I have a pretty high pain threshold but that was just nuts!

With every pounding step on my foot I thought, "This is soooo not worth $15 an hour!" Did I mention that the pay scale down here is significantly lower for group fitness instructors? No? Well it is. In N.J. I was making $34 an hour (heel pain is a little easier to swallow when you are being well compensated.)

So, anyhoo. The boys are happier, I'm happier, things are going well. Now, if I could just walk...


Look to the finish!